# Jams, skills and confidence



## 4321 (Nov 25, 2008)

Hi there,

So Ive started to get out there and attend some jams. Been to 5 so far (managed to attend 2 yesterday). I seem to have no fear in getting on stage, but what I lack is confidence in my skills. I play it safe by playing the same licks over and over again (not always skillfully), despite learning and practising new ones every week. Im truley afraid to embarass myself or those im jamming with. I do get compliments and encouragement, but I can sometimes be my own worst enemy.

Any advice on how to gain some more confidence or should it just naturally (and hopefully) get better the more I get out there and play? Any one selling magic confidence pills? lol


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## blam (Feb 18, 2011)

This is relevant to my interests.

I too have have started jamming, but I'm not sure the guy I jam with is a good fit for me. He has 25 years experience and I only have one. I make mistakes often. The more I make I less embarassed I feel. However, this is in the privacy of a home and not on stage.

My advice is don't be afraid to make mistakes. Everyone does it.


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## PaulS (Feb 27, 2006)

Jamming is where you try your new licks out, see how they feel and where they fit. It is a time to be adventureous. It is also a time to make mistakes that is how you learn.


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## Guest (Nov 6, 2011)

Try going to YouTube and search Blues Backing Tracks. Try out your different chops in different keys, patterns. Get a good sense of the beat, and also what bar you are in, and what chord you are playing. 

Repeat.

Note: You can save the tracks to your favorites in YT or use a program like RealPlayer to download the videos and play them off-line.


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## jeremy_green (Nov 10, 2010)

PaulS said:


> Jamming is where you try your new licks out, see how they feel and where they fit. It is a time to be adventureous. It is also a time to make mistakes that is how you learn.


Jamming - yes try out whatever.... A live jam - in front of an audience.... not so much. When you play live you want to play right in your comfort zone. The thing is, as you practice and improve what is "comfortable" gets higher (level wise). When you see great players play - they aren't reaching for things. They own them.... they are having fun and relaxed. In their private practice rooms they are working on adding new tools to the box.

Confidence comes with time and experience. Just keep playing out as much as possible. Do your best and if that means repeating licks then fine. Hell, listen to how many times Stevie Ray Vaughan repeated licks... did it ever bug you? Probably no, you just thought of it as his style right?

Play with as many different people in as many different situations as you can.


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## flashPUNK (Feb 16, 2006)

blam said:


> This is relevant to my interests.
> 
> I too have have started jamming, but I'm not sure the guy I jam with is a good fit for me. He has 25 years experience and I only have one. I make mistakes often. The more I make I less embarassed I feel. However, this is in the privacy of a home and not on stage.
> 
> My advice is don't be afraid to make mistakes. Everyone does it.


In my experience playing with musicians with more experience than you will help make you a better player faster.


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## blam (Feb 18, 2011)

flashPUNK said:


> In my experience playing with musicians with more experience than you will help make you a better player faster.


its not actually his experience I'm worried about. it's his playing style. he's confined himself to a small genre of music in which I'm not particularly thrilled about. nice guy, he knows his stuff and he knows enough to help me improve though


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## TWRC (Apr 22, 2011)

I couldn't agree with this more. Playing with people who have more experience really pushes your boundaries and I find in live situations make you do things that you didn't know you could do.



flashPUNK said:


> In my experience playing with musicians with more experience than you will help make you a better player faster.


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## shoretyus (Jan 6, 2007)

blam said:


> its not actually his experience I'm worried about. it's his playing style. he's confined himself to a small genre of music in which I'm not particularly thrilled about. nice guy, he knows his stuff and he knows enough to help me improve though


25 yr player... does he know different styles? Push his boundries a bit and suggest a playing style that is a different and it could level the playing field between the two of you... which could give you more confidence too. 

I guess it comes down to developing a little _*EGO *_... which you have to check in at the door sometimes.


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## shoretyus (Jan 6, 2007)

shoretyus said:


> _*EGO *_... which you have to check in at the door sometimes.


It's a fine line sometimes.

Which reminds me of a situation that I have been in recently. I have been the seasoned player with a group of friends ( 5 or 6 people). A year or so they have gotten serious about playing (one woman who is starting from scratch @ 65 and doing well) decided to get together once a week a year ago. They have progressed well enough to play out at a few local jams. It's a good way for me to hone my bluegrass lead and play some lapsteel. 

The guy that was organizer of this now has an ego that is starting to get out of control. Snapping at other players a our get togethers. I ended walking out and probably won't go back. His ego has surpassed his talent. He snapped at me last week to make sure the song I was going to play that I " did it right " ... huh.... dude .. this is a song that we have played for 8 months and he CAN"T play it at all because he won't bother to learn F#m or B...... despite me making attempts at giving him some lessons. 

*It's not fun*, I am done.... but there are others to play with.


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## Fajah (Jun 28, 2006)

Mr. Rock & Roll said:


> Any advice on how to gain some more confidence or should it just naturally (and hopefully) get better the more I get out there and play? Any one selling magic confidence pills? lol


Couple of suggestions:

1) Unless you've been playing a long time and have allot of experience, get an idea of what tunes are going to played in advance of a jam session. It will give you a chance to listen to the original tunes and practice. Maybe pick up a lick or two to try out.

2) If you're try some different approaches on soloing or chord changes, manage everyone's expectations by letting them know that you're going to try some new........ before you play the tune.

The more you jam with others, the better you'll get at it.


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## cheezyridr (Jun 8, 2009)

you'll be surprised how fast you improve and how much fun you have. just dive in!


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