# America demands more guitar solos



## JHarasym (Mar 27, 2007)

https://entertainment.theonion.com/...tm_source=Facebook&utm_medium=SocialMarketing


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## Guest (Apr 27, 2018)

_According to thousands of amped-up sources nationwide, a guitar solo in which the guy bends the strings really 
far while leaning his head back and grimacing is currently a top national priority. Additionally, citizens from all 
50 states emphasized the importance of the guitarist running all over the stage, jumping off an amplifier, and 
then sliding on his knees through the lead singer’s legs while rocking out hard the entire time._


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## Mooh (Mar 7, 2007)

Tell Tchaikovsky the news.


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## Robert1950 (Jan 21, 2006)

_"After all, I taught God how to play guitar"_


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## bolero (Oct 11, 2006)

hey Tchaikovsky, tell ROGER WATERS the news...

his new album is screaming for some GUITAR SOLOS or MINIMOOG SOLOS


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## Robert1950 (Jan 21, 2006)

@bolero - love your avatar.


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## bolero (Oct 11, 2006)

ha, thanks man!

still looking for a good pan galactic gargle blaster


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## Guest (Apr 27, 2018)

bolero said:


> still looking for a good pan galactic gargle blaster


Pan Galactic Gargle Blaster

Ingredients: 
Ice 
.5 oz Bourbon 
.75 oz Gin 
1 oz Sour Apple Pucker
.5 oz Blue Curacao 
1 oz Lemon Juice 
.5 oz Simple Syrup 
1 Lemon Twist


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## Robert1950 (Jan 21, 2006)

What happened to the plutonium???



laristotle said:


> Pan Galactic Gargle Blaster
> 
> Ingredients:
> Ice
> ...


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## Guest (Apr 27, 2018)

Robert1950 said:


> What happened to the plutonium???


If you watch the vid, he says that he's leaving out the ingredients that would kill you. lol.


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## Robert1950 (Jan 21, 2006)

laristotle said:


> If you watch the vid, he says that he's leaving out the ingredients that would kill you. lol.


Then what you have is the Shirley Temple version of a REAL Pan Galactic Gargle Blaster


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## bolero (Oct 11, 2006)

Take the juice from one bottle of Ol' Janx Spirit.
Pour into it one measure of water from the seas of Santraginus V 

Allow three cubes of Arcturan Mega-gin to melt into the mixture (it must be properly iced or the benzene is lost).
Allow four litres of Fallian marsh gas to bubble through it, in memory of all those happy hikers who have died of pleasure in the Marshes of Fallia.
Over the back of a silver spoon float a measure of Qualactin Hypermint extract, redolent of all the heady odours of the dark Qualactin Zones, subtle, sweet and mystic.
Drop in the tooth of an Algolian Suntiger. Watch it dissolve, spreading the fires of the Algolian Suns deep into the heart of the drink.
Sprinkle Zamphuor.
Add an olive.
Drink...


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## Guest (Apr 28, 2018)

bolero said:


> Take the juice from one bottle of Ol' Janx Spirit.


"_Oh don't give me none more of that Old Janx Spirit
No, don't you give me none more of that Old Janx Spirit
For my head will fly, my tongue will lie, my eyes will fry and I may die
Won't you pour me one more of that sinful Old Janx Spirit_"
—An ancient Orion mining son


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## amagras (Apr 22, 2015)

Yeah! Pantera!


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## bolero (Oct 11, 2006)

haha what a great thread derail!!


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## mhammer (Nov 30, 2007)

The Onion had an item some years back announcing that Yngwie Malmsteen was officially changing his name to Yngwie Fucking Malmsteen.


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## Guest (May 20, 2018)




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