# Anyone else dealing with anxiety?



## BlueRocker (Jan 5, 2020)

I've had it more or less under control for a few years now but today is not being a good one. I think the combination of new job, new house, renovations, COVID fatigue, and the state of the world are catching up with me. Anyone care to share their secret sauce for getting out of this kind of funk?


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## Verne (Dec 29, 2018)

Daily. I take medication for depression and anxiety. Some days are just bad days. There really is not one thing that works for everybody. Deep breaths, focus on what makes you happy, think relaxing thoughts (albeit counterintuitive during an episode). Talk to somebody. Talk about your feelings of anxiety, or anything. Just get your mind settled best you know how. Avoid caffeine and alcohol for now. Don't go into a room and be by yourself, it'll give your mind time to continue it's racing thoughts. These may not help, but you asked, and these are suggestions. Busy yourself somehow.


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## Mark Brown (Jan 4, 2022)

My short answer is blissful ignorance.

I suffered from debilitating anxiety as a teenager, something to do with drug use and an active mind compiled a world view that was rather.... how does one say, bleak?

I still remember to the day but I just let go of that which I cannot change. Easier said than done for certain, but you have to understand, emotionally not mentally that there are things that are beyond your control and your desire to control them cannot be reconciled. This was the source of my experience, I cannot speak to yours.

As an "adult" now, when I feel like things are going off the rails I take a deep breath, heave a big sigh and say out loud "what can ya do". It might sound rather basic, but it works for me. General levels of sobriety I also found to be a boon to the situation. The hardest part in life, at least in my experience has been learning to just let go.


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## Paul Running (Apr 12, 2020)

Doubling-up on the humour seems to work for me, sometimes just real corny stuff works for me. I like watching reruns of SNL ...Matt Foley type stuff. Try not to let unwanted stuff rent head space.


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## Brewhouse (Mar 6, 2017)

A good therapist is worth their weight in gold. I've got no shame in saying I have been in therapy before and I'm sure I will be there again. Utilize this resource if you can, a trained professional sees things you cannot see, and draws the answers out of you without you knowing it happened. And reach out to your friends, make them aware much like you did here. Sometimes all you need is a helpful ear and someone to talk to.


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## silvertonebetty (Jan 4, 2015)

BlueRocker said:


> I've had it more or less under control for a few years now but today is not being a good one. I think the combination of new job, new house, renovations, COVID fatigue, and the state of the world are catching up with me. Anyone care to share their secret sauce for getting out of this kind of funk?


I hear you anxiety is no fun I have a weighted blanket I place over my shoulders and read my bible. I guess it’s the same as meditation. And I’d also say avoid caffeine or liquor. If you want pop sprite because there’s no caffeine in it the doctor told me .

I also step away from the Internet once and a while.

man’s yes that’s a lot of big change and tbh I’d probably would be anxious too.


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## torndownunit (May 14, 2006)

I am on meds, but I find lifestyle essential for my own treatment. I eat well, I do yoga every morning, I hike at least 3 times a week in the winter, more in the summer. Being out in nature instantly winds me down. The meds are what gets me over a hump. But doing lifestyle stuff that makes me physically and mentally healthy is the real treatment for me.

As far as Covid and War etc, someone else's post summed it up. What can you do? I just have to do the best I can with my own life. I've been rock bottom with depression and anxiety before. I don't want to be back there.

Edit: if you get really stuck, therapy. Seriously. I'm not in it right now, but I know if things are starting to look bad, that's the first place I'll be.


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## Greenbacker (Mar 29, 2007)

Sorry to hear you’re in a not-so-great place.

When I’ve been there in the past, I’ve used these 5 tools, with great, eventual success:

therapy
meditation (headspace app is great)
exercise
writing things down/journaling
cooking

Then, I am patient/realistic with myself. If I can do any 3 of those 5 things in a day, then I see that as a success. All of these things feel initially uncomfortable but then, they quickly become natural — or at least they did for me. Creating rituals around those things, is a secondary positive outcome of those things, as I believe rituals and creating order can also lead to happiness. 

I know that everyone is different but maybe some of these things would work for you. I find all of these things help me focus and be more grounded & in my body, so to speak.

I honestly think that the most important thing is to have something to look forward to: a trip, a weekend away with a buddy, a new project… and hey, that project could even be yourself! 

According to the Dalai Lama, another big one is service — doing something for someone else.

Putting the phone down and cutting back on any booze/drugs is a good idea too.

Good luck, friend! I know everything stinks in the world right now but I find even with the restrictions lifting, the longer days, and the weather improving, that things are looking up.


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## Jackvulcan9000 (Sep 4, 2021)

I've found L-Theanine to have a nice calming effect. Off-the-shelf and relatively cheap.


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## Parabola (Oct 22, 2021)

I don’t suffer from anxiety, but have friends and loved ones that do.

Just was going to chirp in to say, good on you all for being open and supportive and sharing what works for you and your collective positive and outlook. Always does my spirits good to see people looking after each other.


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## Mark Brown (Jan 4, 2022)

Parabola said:


> I don’t suffer from anxiety, but have friends and loved ones that do.
> 
> Just was going to chirp in to say, good on you all for being open and supportive and sharing what works for you and your collective positive and outlook. Always does my spirits good to see people looking after each other.


The key to being at peace with one's self is the ability to openly admit any aspect of your being. Being able to do so without regard for judgement, as that which makes up your humanity is yours to hold.

There has to be something to being a musician in all of this that would open a person a little more. Music is the language of the soul and if you can bare that to the masses, a little heartfelt honesty can't be that bad either


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## Parabola (Oct 22, 2021)

Brunz said:


> The key to being at peace with one's self is the ability to openly admit any aspect of your being. Being able to do so without regard for judgement, as that which makes up your humanity is yours to hold.
> 
> There has to be something to being a musician in all of this that would open a person a little more. Music is the language of the soul and if you can bare that to the masses, a little heartfelt honesty can't be that bad either


These are very wise words. I like the way you think!


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## mhammer (Nov 30, 2007)

There is a documented clearcut relationship between loss and anxiety/depression. More loss, especially more _ruminating_ about loss, = more anxiety/depression. I recall one paper I read in grad school that drew the surprising conclusion that older adults, even though we see lots of depression in them, are noticeably *LESS* depressed than would be predicted, given the number of loss events experienced by them/us on a daily basis. The question is: why?

One of the explanations advanced, and the focus of much research, is the role of reminiscence. Not the oh-man-that-was-a-great-song/band/show type of reminiscence, but rather reflecting on challenges in one's life that had been overcome. In other words, the I/we-got-through-THAT-so-I-know-we-can-get-through-THIS type of reminiscence. And the older one gets, the easier that is to do.

Muddy Waters used to sing "Everything, gon' be alright alright alright", and it can be hard to persuade oneself of that when focusing on the present too much. That doesn't mean one should _dwell_ on or in the past. Rather, the successful parts of the past can* inform* the present, and result in hope. Perspective is a great medication...and it's free, with unlimited prescription renewals.


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## player99 (Sep 5, 2019)

I have been thinking how bad it must be in Ukraine and my issues seem small in comparison.


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## Sketchy Jeff (Jan 12, 2019)

i don't like routines but keeping a routine is important to keeping my head screwed on straight so i do it for that reason
i go to bed at the same time every day, get up at the same time, have the same thing for breakfast, drink my one cup of coffee ... a few other things too. i've been doing it about 3 years. 
it's boring and dumb but when i quit doing it things start getting fun and interesting and i stay up until i'm done what i'm working on and get up early to keep doing it then crash when the thing is finished but then pretty soon after that things start coming unglued and flying off in all directions and i'm a wreck or i sit there and stare at the wall and nothing happens.
at this stage of my life i'd rather be stable and meet my obligations than be an interesting creative trainwreck disaster. 
a little while ago i added checking instagram to the routine limits - once a day for 5 minutes - and this week i plan to add checking the news to that routine as well - once a day in the middle of the day neither first thing in the morning nor last thing before bed. anything that really drags me down or leaves me sitting there staring into space thinking WTF am i even doing any of this for gets boxed up and limited to a few specific minutes per day. i used to try and quit doing that stuff completely but then it was binge and purge cycles that weren't helpful at all so it's better for me to keep doing the thing but on a limit. even beer is on it. one a week on fridays. 

i know some people enjoy routine and find it satisfying and productive. not me. i don't enjoy it but it works. i'm looking forward to the day when i can loosen up a bit but it's not here yet. 

j


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## RBlakeney (Mar 12, 2017)

Just get some dogs, that’s what I do. now they have anxiety too.


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## Verne (Dec 29, 2018)

Parabola said:


> I don’t suffer from anxiety, but have friends and loved ones that do.
> 
> Just was going to chirp in to say, good on you all for being open and supportive and sharing what works for you and your collective positive and outlook. Always does my spirits good to see people looking after each other.


I honestly found it helped me deal with my mental state once I started being more open. Explaining to people what you go through, and try hard to control, helps them understand you better and know that at times, it's not what, but who you are when you react or seem overwhelmed. It's comforting to find others who have been afraid to talk about themselves in that respect and through each other, being more open is a sort of therapy. If others can recognize the trigger response(s), it's possible they can help control it right from the beginning of your "moment". I made all managers at work aware so they know that maybe that volatile reaction is not what it sounded like, but more of a reaction to your possible state. They can take a moment and talk to you knowing that you can have these even though you are normally pretty "even" most times.


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## Rollin Hand (Jul 12, 2012)

Been there,done that, bought the T-shirt. And the pandemic hasn't helped.

Like others here, I suggest therapy. O good therapist will give strategies to deal with these situations, aswell as helping you to realose when it is happening and nip it in the bud.

Per mhammer, my situation was preceded by the loss of my parents, and then me not dealing with it. Add in job and relationship stress, and I was a basket case -- I even gave up guitar for an extended periid!. Therapy,, medication and my wife saved me.


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## bw66 (Dec 17, 2009)

Thankfully, anxiety is not high on my list of issues. But I have lots of friends and family for whom it is.

As others have said, fresh air and exercise, healthy living, therapy and/or counseling, and a support group can make most issues manageable.

Emma McAdam has a really good YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/c/TherapyinaNutshell


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## Tom T (May 3, 2016)

Hang in there BlueRocker, it’s sounds like you have a lot going on, and the Ukraine war just as we were beginning to see a little light after 2 years of Covid is a real hit. Doing what you’re doing now on the forum, and talking about it is a great way to ease some stress. Exercise, deep breathing, listening to less news and talking to a professional if you think that would help. As dark as it seems now, it will get better.


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## laristotle (Aug 29, 2019)




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## Ship of fools (Nov 17, 2007)

Talk to someone and everyone and let them know what's going on. Don't think that you are the only one going through this at this time. 
And remember don't sweat the small stuff they always work them self's out and the big stuff is always easier to take care if you just share it and get other opinions as to what you might be able to do about it.
I deal with shit every day and I am fortunate that I have loved ones who understand why I say the things I do ( like its time to meet my maker and such ) but they get it and then next day maybe a bit better for me having shared my feelings and such.
OK that all I have to say, this took to long to type


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## mhammer (Nov 30, 2007)

Here's a useful article that was recommended by Pocket.









How to Stop Catastrophizing: An Expert’s Guide


A clinical psychologist suggests a three-pronged plan for tackling anxiety and approaching each day logically and positively.




getpocket.com


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## FatStrat2 (Apr 7, 2021)

From my observations of some friends and relatives afflicted w/ high anxiety, it's mostly in the genes - as well as everyone has their breaking point, of course. I also think that each person has their own way of dealing with it whether it's prescription meds (or other), exercise, positive attitude, companionship, religion, therapy, diet or other ways - whatever works, and a lot of that does. Depression is one of the most highly treatable issues we have.

What works for me is stepping back and giving thanks.

For thousands of years, mankind had survival in mind. Simple things like food, shelter, procreation, etc.. 21st century man has complicated that w/ 'conveniences' like computers, etc.. Previous generations have no idea of the hardships of war, famine or any of the other ills that cursed frontier people or soldiers whether it was a few hundred of a few thousand years ago.

Many millions - in fact billions - of people would consider themselves very fortunate to be 'suffering' from good health, a new house, new renovations and/or a new job in a peaceful country. I quietly give thanks for all of that - every damn day.


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## CathodeRay (Jan 12, 2018)

I learned this trick the other day: if you find it hard to be grateful for what you have, be grateful for what's missing in your life; cancer, a bad marriage, whatever works for your negative outlook to instinctively latch onto. In other words, hack your negatively. Gratefulness, regardless of how you get there, is vital. 

Feedly news reader probably saved both my wife & I's sanity to some extent. Cut out the cable news sht storm. We curate our news feeds from a wide variety of different (reasonably sane) points of view, to better understand how both sides in the current political divide feel. This tactic makes you quickly realize everyone wants the same things; safety, health, good friends, access to good education, the list goes on. 

Stay off social media if most of what you're reading is just madness and outrage. You'll know it is deep in your gut. 

Walks. Nature. Music.


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## SWLABR (Nov 7, 2017)

I have been "down" for a few years. I suppose I would be classified, at least mildly as depressed. I'm not sure what's going on, I just know I'm _off_. My wife sees it too. She thinks it's related to my Mum's passing. Just hit the 10yr mark. I hope I haven't been blue that long... this past Fall I finally decided to do something about it. I decided I (at the very least) needed to talk to someone. We have an Employee Assistance Program (EAP) here at work. I reached out. Well, the pandemic strikes again. They had stopped booking for anything "in person". And by that, it also includes phone consults. I was referred to a case worker who took my case after I submitted a whack load of really personal questions into an online form. I successfully submitted my profile, and got a pop-up to say someone would reach out in 2-3 business days. Someone did. A long convoluted essay asking more questions. I responded right away. and waited 2-3 business days for a response. When it came, I had to go back a reread my response to gauge what their "advice" was based upon. We bantered back and forth a few times, before I realized this was causing me anxiety too! ha, ha.. You can't pour your heart out via type and then wait 2-3 business days for a response. And, it seemed, I was in a very different mood when I wrote the initial post, then when I got a response, and had to reread the last thing I said. 
In the end, I packed it in, but I know I have something I need to speak to someone about. I just don't know what it is, and who I should speak to about it. 

Mental health is a vital part of our overall health. Same as not pigging out of junk food, same as not hitting the bottle everyday. The stigma behind "mental toughness" and the fear of ridicule keeps a lot of people from getting help.


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## Milkman (Feb 2, 2006)

Weed.


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## laristotle (Aug 29, 2019)

Get yourself a teddy bear or imaginary friend to talk to.


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## mhammer (Nov 30, 2007)

Memory is inextricably interwoven with context, and stored with respect to context, such that being in a given context again reminds us of what is connected to it, and being out of that context makes it harder to retrieve information bound up in that context. This is why you can simply not recognize someone you know when you encounter them in a context you've never seen them in, like an airport or different city. When I was teaching, I would encourage students to, when they could, study for exams in the room where they would write them, to make what they studied easier to recall.

Emotion and emotional/mood state is also a powerful context. A negative mood or emotion will "remind" us of other events that also occurred in that state. Recollection of those events, or even anticipated events, sustains that negative mood which prompts more recollection of negative things, yielding a downward self-sustaining spiral. Some folks are more adept at "repairing" their mood, and can escape that spiral. Other folks not so much. To some extent, things that can "change the emotional channel" can stop the spiral. Some will use things like exercise to do that. Some will use "self-medication". Some will have hobbies or activities -whether social or private - to immerse themselves in and change the channel. Some will use meditation. I'm sure there are ther equally effective strategies. Some interpretations of anxiety and depression reframe those as deficits in "mood repair".

Though depression, anxiety and panic-disorder are not the exact same thing, they do live in the same apartment building. One of the more innovative approaches to panic disorder that I've seen was a strategy explored by one of the clinical psych profs at UNB. Part of what creates the spiral into panic is the preliminary physical experience of fear. That physical (gut feeling) context prompts recall/anxiety about the fear spinning out of control, and the person literally becomes afraid of fear itself. What this prof explored was inducing the physical/visceral manifestations of fear, while the person was sitting, relaxed, in a context that would not normally elicit anxiousness. With a logical and explicit explanation for why they were feeling those feelings (an injection or deliberate hyperventilation), they knew it wasn't part of a panic attack. The idea was to make the physical sensations of fear a poorer signal/predictor of panic, and reason for further panic. It's a purely Pavlovian approach. Ring the bell without having any food to follow, and the dog stops drooling anyore when it hears the bell. If gut sensations are dissociated from the idea of them being an "Oh no here it comes again" feeling, t keeps things from spiralling.


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## DBX160 (Mar 15, 2020)

BlueRocker said:


> I've had it more or less under control for a few years now but today is not being a good one. I think the combination of new job, new house, renovations, COVID fatigue, and the state of the world are catching up with me. Anyone care to share their secret sauce for getting out of this kind of funk?


I feel you, short term medication will take the edge off, but please discuss the bug out plan with your doctor. They are life savers but dangerous. I will say I could not live without them but my story is different then most.
An animal or 2 will give you focus and will teach you that there is still hope, they will become your family so make sure your ready for a log term commitment.
Plan something, ANYTHING. then plan more. Small projects that you can get an easy win with (Ex: change out pickups, start a new program and dig in deep, take a course if you have energy, volunteer for anything where you can do something easy for you but difficult for others ... shovel elderly driveway, etc... you will find payback and joy in it I promise) Distraction is the only way to pass the time with any type of comfort. Time is the answer... take it hour by hour when you need to, minute by minute and second by second... know it will pass and you are stronger then you think.... You have several people right here that want to help and care... 
keep reaching out!


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## CathodeRay (Jan 12, 2018)

I've also read a number of times that lower T levels (testosterone) as we get into middle age can cause havoc here - odd mood swings, depression, anxiety, lack of energy, not feeling like yourself at all.


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## LIX (Jun 10, 2009)

To be honest i tried almost every anti anxiety and depression med out there in the past. And most have made me feel numb, a bit of a shell of who i was without them. I had been in a great place for years until covid got to me. I decided i did not want to go down a big pharma path again. So i tried micro dosing mushrooms. By far the best anti aniexty relieve ive ever had. And worth a try if your confortable with it. Hope you find some relief soon.

Also make sure to get exercise, even if its as simple as a walk around the block, ive always found that to help me.


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## BlueRocker (Jan 5, 2020)

Lots of great and appreciated advice here. Today is a much better day. Thanks to all.


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## nman (Sep 14, 2019)

Things got to me last year. 3 or 4 of my friends too. I became OCD and weird new habits surfaced. Just adding another stressor (hearing damage) to covid triggered it. My quirky, super-inquisitive behaviour maddened people. A quick consult with my family Doctor set me back to normalcy. She prescribed psychotherapy. I did not pursue it simply because just having the talk and prescription made me "settle down". This same "course of treatment" got me out of a near-addiction and obesity in years past. So...follow your heart BUT talk to someone about it and get help. Many of us will be here to listen should you continue posting.


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## Midnight Rider (Apr 2, 2015)

St. John's Wort and or medical grade Cannabidiol (CBD) oil or softgels.


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## Verne (Dec 29, 2018)

@BlueRocker Are you able to cycle? Riding a bike is low impact, healthy, get's you places at a decent speed and it's good mental food. It helps clear the mind because it releases endorphins. I do (or try to anyway) a lot of MTBing in the nice weather. It's my zen. I do ride offroad mostly as it makes me pay attention to what I am doing and can't focus on the problems in the world or my mind, or I'll hit a tree. Hiking is awesome as well. Being in nature can be so incredibly soothing. The sounds, the smells, the spaciousness.......it's just so releasing.

I am glad that people here have come together to offer so many ways to deal with something that affects so many, and can be so controllable. Key is recognizing the triggers. Stay well my friend.


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## Mark Brown (Jan 4, 2022)

...... you could always listen to the voices and kill, kill, kill.

Sorry, humor is how I deal with all things.


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## Verne (Dec 29, 2018)

Brunz said:


> ...... you could always listen to the voices and kill, kill, kill.
> 
> Sorry, humor is how I deal with all things.


A lot of people do, but it's just a band aid on a broken leg. I used it to get through a cheating wife that decided to leave. It helped, but it didn't actually "help". I get you though. Don't take me wrong.


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## Mark Brown (Jan 4, 2022)

Verne said:


> A lot of people do, but it's just a band aid on a broken leg. I used it to get through a cheating wife that decided to leave. It helped, but it didn't actually "help". I get you though. Don't take me wrong.


I don't take your meaning wrong at all. Masking is typically not helping. 
Killing on the other hand... well, that remains to be seen


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## Doug Gifford (Jun 8, 2019)

mhammer said:


> Muddy Waters used to sing "Everything, gon' be alright alright alright", and it can be hard to persuade oneself of that when focusing on the present too much.


Thank you. Nice song for the times.


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## tdotrob (Feb 24, 2019)

Good diet, good weed and guitars.


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## nman (Sep 14, 2019)

Me again. My guitar time went way down during my bad spell, 3-4 months. I got it back by focussing on really learning some of my fave tunes (Santana and SRV).


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## Clypher (Jan 5, 2007)

I've been through some pretty intense anxiety attacks, most recently about a year ago, and occasional flare-ups as well. The biggest thing that helps is doing something that feels like an accomplishment each day. A good example is a disciplined exercise or practice routine. Cleaning up the house works well. For some people, socializing makes it better, for others, worse. Therapy helped a ton. I was as close to starting medication as having the prescription filled, but in humorous fashion I was too anxious to take it. That was almost ten years ago. I'm glad I didn't, and I urge people to try therapy and exercise first to save the money (edit: therapy ain't cheap  ) and commitment that entails an SSRI prescription. I know many people that take them, and although for the most part after taking time to find the right dose and/or medication it is fine, all of them have tried to stop taking them with bad results. Unfortunately there is no instant cure for this sort of thing, but it's human behavior, there is no instant change for any of it. Fortunately, it IS very treatable, and you are not alone. I actually have a harder time thinking of any one of my friends or family that hasn't had head on collisions with depression or anxiety.


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## dgreen (Sep 3, 2016)

In general, anxiety is very treatable and one of the best means to treat anxiety is finding yourself a good therapist. Fortunately I am married to one and being able to hear the prospective from a professional on how to accept things I can not change and then given the motivation and tools to change all the things I am able to is priceless.
And as mentioned, exercise, diet and rest are all positive contributing factors.


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## butterknucket (Feb 5, 2006)

I just found out a little while ago a girl who lived beside me many years ago wrote this.


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## Mutant_Guitar (Oct 24, 2021)

Each day presents the possibility that one may face any severity or minutiae of emotions, thoughts, imaginings etc. One cannot simply be suspended in blissful-stasis while the world changes and things die and grow anew. We too take on these processes because we have the faculties and the capabilities of experiencing them (a biological imperative). A time to ponder death, and painful mutilation of your blessed body-vehicle is in essence tremendously human, but one thing is for sure and your anxiety or self-torment is proof of this: humans are incredibly resilient, and the spirit body chooses to live on or to pass on. This is a fact of being. One does not need beckon their self-destruction because it is momentary and it is imminent. Nor does one choose to be born anew, to grow vestiges with which to brace the future, this is bio-productive. All is merely an experience, and your happiness is contingent on your ability to accept and extract from the experiences presented to you. There is a lesson in every experience, and by that, life is not merely a valley of minutiae and a sea of mundanity...it is all imperative and meaningful. If war, disease, and famine are a fact of planetary life, than we too carry the potential of these things inside of us, we have remote-access to these realities whether we would like to or not. Our cells too engage in a war of sorts, they divide and conquer, duplicate and cannibalize.


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