# online buying etiquette now



## Sketchy Jeff (Jan 12, 2019)

OK i'm old enough to have learned about life in the age of cash 
i do e-transfer sometimes but it's still a second choice for me
if i see something i like in an online ad i contact the seller, negotiate price, agree on a meet point, when we arrive i look at the thing quickly to see if it's as described, count out the amount we decided on and we're done. it's usually a minute or less. occasionally you strike up a conversation with the seller and it goes on a bit longer but not usually. it's clear for everybody in advance and quick at the time. 

so how do you do it with e-transfer?

my son bought a Focusrite 2i2 and a nice Rode mic the other day through an online ad. perfect condition with all the packaging and receipts included. communication with the seller in advance was good. price was ballpark fair and they negotiated down a little bit since he was taking both things. she stipulated cash-free transaction and that was fine with him he often uses e-transfer. 

he showed up at the fast food place they were meeting at, she showed up with the stuff, it was all as good or better than described, they had a quick conversation about the e-transfer and he hit send

and then it didn't go through

his bank said it went through but she never got it

then eventually she got a notification but no funds transferred 

then he got notified that it was flagged and not processed after all he should try again

so he did send the whole amount a second time and it seemed OK

tick tick tick waiting awkward small talk 

then she got another notification but the money still didn't arrive in her account

eventually AN HOUR passed. as a seller i would never have waited that long but she did and as far as he could tell the money was out of his account. there they were sitting in a fast food place at night each drumming their fingers on the table waiting staring at their phones

finally she said she needed to go. she said he seemed trustworthy he should take the stuff and they'd stay in touch by phone and text and get it wrapped up. that was close to 2 hours after they met. he went home with the stuff and he didn't know whether he had paid nothing, the full amount, or double the full amount for it

it was a weekend PLUS TWO BUSINESS DAYS later before the money went out of his account and she confirmed that she got it

there's no way that's a good idea but what do you do when an e-transfer trips up in process? surely it's not realistic for either buyer or seller to need to expect that kind of delay and uncertainty

what do you all do who use e-transfer for person to person buying more regularly than i do?

j


----------



## diyfabtone (Mar 9, 2016)

Never had an eTransfer take longer than 15 mins to go through when I send (CIBC). You should ask your bank why it was so long.


----------



## Chito (Feb 17, 2006)

When that happens, I cancel the emt and then go to an ATM machine and withdraw the money in cash.


----------



## Sneaky (Feb 14, 2006)

I sold a Super Reverb a couple years ago locally. They buyer came to my place, checked it out and sent me an e transfer. We made small talk for a bit while waiting for it to come through. An hour or so transpired and still nothing. I trusted the guy but there was no way he was leaving with the amp. He ended up going to an ATM to get cash for me. Of course just as he gets back and hands me the cash my phone dings with the deposit message.


----------



## BlueRocker (Jan 5, 2020)

I had that happen last year twice. Both times it was credit unions. First one I sold a guitar, dude showed me his phone with the transfer. I had dropped it at his house and he seemed legit so I went about my day and eventually got the transfer. Second one I bought a guitar, and the transfer got flagged as fraud or something - again by a credit union. He was shipping it, so no big deal it cleared to his account before he shipped it.

Scotiabank transfers are the slowest. Royal and TD are instant up to about $2000.


----------



## Mark Brown (Jan 4, 2022)

If I meet you in person, we exchange cash. Thats the end of that for me.


----------



## RBlakeney (Mar 12, 2017)

The slowness isn't from the banks end usually, Other than sometimes when you add a new person and send a larger amount.
Sometimes that will trigger a fraud alert for someone to go review it.( usually about half an hour or so)
Your issue with 2 business days means it was a time out issue with Certapay (Interac) so rather than the transfer going through as per normal, it had to be manually done which takes 2 bus days.


----------



## 2manyGuitars (Jul 6, 2009)

I know larger amounts sometimes take a while so I ask if they have auto-deposit (no password required). If they don’t, I send the password before I head out and only give them the password when the deal checks out.
If they do have auto-deposit, I ask if they can turn it off for 5 minutes while I send it.


----------



## Pat James (5 mo ago)

I have had a similiar issue with etransfer, where I send it, but it takes 45 or more minutes to process. Other times it goes through right away. It seems to only happen when I am etransfering someone from marketplace or kijiji though (never family or friends, even if it's the first time transfering). The awkward small talk is one thing, but if you have an impatient seller it can go south. I've learned how to cancel the etransfer when cash is still a viable option, however at this point I will only send etransfers if I am willing to go out on a limb and pay in advance for something that is a "too good to be true" deal (typically this is only done rarely and I can figure out that they aren't a scammer). If the buyer is adamament on etransfer only, I'm willing to do it as long as they are willing to accept the possiblity that it might take forever.


----------



## Wardo (Feb 5, 2010)

I only do cash and when I meet them I say my name is Sketchy Jeff and ask if they've ever experienced an armed robbery .. lol


----------



## carboncopy (4 mo ago)

I try to do cash only, in my opinion e-transfers are adding a lot of potential complication to a deal. Apparently there are ways a e-transfer can be reversed, even months later so I refuse to take them for anything high value.


----------



## BlueRocker (Jan 5, 2020)

carboncopy said:


> Apparently there are ways a e-transfer can be reversed, even months later so I refuse to take them for anything high value.


Fake news


----------



## ondadl (Dec 13, 2012)

Here’s how to do it…

Make the seller use a password for the payment (some have direct deposit assigned and it will not work if set up this way). Send the EMT up to a week early without telling the seller the password. They get the transaction email 1-60 minutes later. When you have the item in hand and it is as described, then you give them the password.


----------



## Pat James (5 mo ago)

carboncopy said:


> I try to do cash only, in my opinion e-transfers are adding a lot of potential complication to a deal. Apparently there are ways a e-transfer can be reversed, even months later so I refuse to take them for anything high value.


Im pretty sure the only way to reverse them after is to send them the money back from your end. Once the money is in their bank that's it.


----------



## carboncopy (4 mo ago)

Pat James said:


> Im pretty sure the only way to reverse them after is to send them the money back from your end. Once the money is in their bank that's it.


From my understanding, if someone pays you from a hacked/compromised bank account, once that transaction is flagged by the person who actually owns the account, it can be clawed back by the bank as a fraudulent transaction.


----------



## Guncho (Jun 16, 2015)

The majority of people are still doing cash.


----------



## Sketchy Jeff (Jan 12, 2019)

Guncho said:


> The majority of people are still doing cash.


the majority of people of a certain age i think 
j


----------



## Sketchy Jeff (Jan 12, 2019)

yup this one did involve a credit union
i wonder why they would be particularly picky on flagging? smaller that banks over all so more careful with fraud issues?
j


----------



## Guncho (Jun 16, 2015)

Sketchy Jeff said:


> the majority of people of a certain age i think
> j


I buy and sell a lot of stuff from kids hockey equipment to guitar gear and it's 99% cash.


----------



## 1SweetRide (Oct 25, 2016)

Sketchy Jeff said:


> OK i'm old enough to have learned about life in the age of cash
> i do e-transfer sometimes but it's still a second choice for me
> if i see something i like in an online ad i contact the seller, negotiate price, agree on a meet point, when we arrive i look at the thing quickly to see if it's as described, count out the amount we decided on and we're done. it's usually a minute or less. occasionally you strike up a conversation with the seller and it goes on a bit longer but not usually. it's clear for everybody in advance and quick at the time.
> 
> ...


EFT is awkward. Misspell the recipient's email and your money is gone forever. I've had to wait up to an hour for a buyer's funds to reach my account. I much prefer cash for FTF. EFT is fine if done in advance.


----------



## Sketchy Jeff (Jan 12, 2019)

I've had delays on EMT with stuff that i've sold occasionally but in those cases it was agricultural equipment or construction equipment or a canoe or something like that. rural area rural buyer rural seller so if it takes a while there's two middle aged guys leaning on the hood of a pickup griping about the state of the world for a while or a longer while it doesn't make much difference. when i buy music stuff it almost always ends up being in a city or larger town and i want to be in and out of the transaction as quick as i can. so, ironically, i'm more likely to use an envelope full of cash with a transaction in an urban area

i heard about this whole thing after the fact from my son. i couldn't believe the seller waited as long as she did and then left the stuff with him and trusted the process. in the end it all turned out but if i was her i'd be reluctant to do it again

j


----------



## bgreenhouse (Jan 4, 2014)

I have this issue with my bank. Seems to randomly take a long time. My solution, when possible, is to transfer in advance with a password. If the seller has enabled autotransfer (which you'll see when you set up the transfer) it won't work, but if they haven't you send it an hour or so in advance and then give them the password verbally when you arrive. Works like a charm.


----------



## KapnKrunch (Jul 13, 2016)

Sketchy Jeff said:


> guys leaning on the hood of a pickup griping about the state of the world for a while


This is the best part of any transaction, even with cash.


----------



## Pat James (5 mo ago)

Online buying etiquette is probably different for some people, but to me it boils down to not wasting each other's time. I can quickly tell when someone is interested in the item and usually when they aren't. There are some key words that will allude to someone that will likely not be buying the item. "What's your lowest price?". "How good does it sound?". "**random dollar amount offer". "Is this available?". "What is your address so I can send the courier to you with a cash envelope". "**Tells me random information about my gear".


----------



## info_please73 (Jan 15, 2020)

I try to use cash almost exclusively. It’s just that while I have no problem spending $5,000 or $10,000 (lol not that it happens but one day it will) in cash but how does a seller feel about being handed $6,000 cash? Do young people prefer E transfer? I absolutely hate the idea of E transfers and debit cards and online banking and all that stuff


----------



## Mark Brown (Jan 4, 2022)

info_please73 said:


> I try to use cash almost exclusively. It’s just that while I have no problem spending $5,000 or $10,000 (lol not that it happens but one day it will) in cash but how does a seller feel about being handed $6,000 cash? Do young people prefer E transfer? I absolutely hate the idea of E transfers and debit cards and online banking and all that stuff


cashiers cheque made out to "cash". Thats my big money go to.


----------



## info_please73 (Jan 15, 2020)

Mark Brown said:


> cashiers cheque made out to "cash". Thats my big money go to.


how do I go about getting a cashiers cheque made? Is that the same as a certified cheque? I would just prefer there be no paper trail lol


----------



## Mark Brown (Jan 4, 2022)

info_please73 said:


> how do I go about getting a cashiers cheque made? Is that the same as a certified cheque? I would just prefer there be no paper trail lol


Same thing, but you don't have to link it to anything. Present cash, get cheque.

Last time I had one drawn they weren't too happy making it out to cash but I went on to explain my drug dealers didn't really like their names on things. I still have a hard time believing I haven't ever been arrested. Problem is I think I'm funny... not so much the public.


----------



## PBGas (Jan 14, 2017)

I sold my Axe III to a super nice gent on our Board here back in the summer who I met locally. We did EFT via interac and it was quick and complete in under 5 minutes.


----------



## Sketchy Jeff (Jan 12, 2019)

PBGas said:


> I sold my Axe III to a super nice gent on our Board here back in the summer who I met locally. We did EFT via interac and it was quick and complete in under 5 minutes.


see that's the thing i did an EFT after this thing i described earlier for a larger amount same institution and it went through before we were done having the conversation about what to do if it didn't go through. it would have taken longer to count out the cash. if it was consistently slow or quick i could deal with it but a few seconds one time and days the next time is no good
j


----------



## KapnKrunch (Jul 13, 2016)

Sketchy Jeff said:


> if it was consistently slow or quick i could deal with


Comment from my wife: "Maybe it depends on the time of month. Maybe an algorithm delays it for an extra month's interest? Because it sure doesn't take long for a movie to download and that's a much bigger file." 

There you go... if you haven't heard an urban myth by ten o'clock, start one.


----------



## Sketchy Jeff (Jan 12, 2019)

KapnKrunch said:


> if you haven't heard an urban myth by ten o'clock, start one


amen brother that's what i need to hear on a snowy tuesday morning

i had a complete disaster music practice the other evening with a group of people i've never played with before. amp and a quite large (for me) pedalboard with several layers of drive and delay and reverb with some ambient sounds. all worked as it should during setup. everybody arrived and it all crapped out made the bzzzzzdt! sound and crackled and smelled funny. i hadn't brought a backup solution 'cuz it was a practice didn't even have an acoustic to fall back on. eventually plugged my tele into the second input of the bass amp and we sorta got through key changes and intro/outro choices. 

got home took the amp apart and there was an electrocuted ladybug in the works. cleaned her out and back in business for thursday. 

it's a conspiracy, man

j


----------

